Today, like most days, I went to lunch at Silvia's house. After being there for maybe a minute, she called me over and told me quietly that her daughter, Anji, wants to marry an American for money - Casar a negocio - a business marriage, she said.
Anji is willing to pay up to $7000 for a fake marriage that only needs to last between 3-6 months. However, and Silvia was very specific, there needs to be pictures taken of the couple at a hotel or something, making it look like a real wedding.
If Anji can secure a "business marriage," then she can immediately take her four-year-old son over, get citizenship and then send for her parents and brother and sister to come live with her in Nueva York. The American "husband" has to do nothing more than mark his signature: first for the marriage certificate and then again for the divorce papers.
In the back of my mind, I've always sort-of been waiting for this day. I don't really blame Silvia or Anji for asking me. It's just the way things work here, and if anyone can help them with this, it's the American girl who eats lunch with them everyday.
Part of me wishes I really could find a responsible American male who would do this for their family (I can't believe I really feel that way. Man, I've been in this country way too long). But of course, I know this isn't going to happen, and although it seems easy enough, things like this are always more complicated than originally anticipated.
I guess in some ways, too, it breaks my heart. Yes, the DR has its problems and corruptions. And I will be the first one to complain about the heat, but for the most part, people do live a happy life here (in my campo at least, here in La Caya). And yet, everyone is so quick to forget it and go. I think about how different Anji's son's life will be if she takes him to America. Yes, he will have more opportunities for education, for work, for all those things everyone knows are important.
But what about him being able to ride a horse down the street at age four? What about him going to school with seriously 15 of his cousins? And seeing his grandparents, great-grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins, second-cousins-twice-removed etc. every single day? Or being able to walk down the road by himself to the corner market to buy a treat without worries? Or being able to take a machete (which is about as tall as him) and attempt to cut into a mango. They sure as hell are not going to let him do that in kindergarten.
Yes, America is great. As most of us realize, it is the land of plenty, and we are blessed to live there. But at what cost is it worth it? Marriage for money? Giving up everything you know and love, including your country, your language, your culture, to have the "American Dream?"
I told Silvia I'd try to find someone for her. I said that partly to appease her and partly because I meant it, or wanted to mean it at least. They've done so much for me, it's the least I could do for them.
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I know this siutation too well. I have known of this happening and it has taken place with people I personally know. Being Dominican myself, I wonder if I could be able to marry out of convienence to help someone out. I would like to think that I would marry (if I would marry again, since I say I would never do it again) someone that I love and it works out that I bring hime to the US and he have a better life, have the same opportunities that I have had growing up in the US. But on the other had if you're already with that mindset that it's only a "marriage" to last a few years it could well possibly work for both parties. I left Dominican Republic such an early age that I don't know what it is to actually live what they do. I always wonder if they want to live the "american dream". I feel like some Dominicans aren't ready to leave that life. Yes, the Dominican lifestyle is great, but it has it downfalls. I love going back to visit but I do enjoy the US!...I may be going off the subject now....didn't think I had some much to say. :)
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